Lately, I've been feeling slightly detached from reality. It's a weird feeling to place.
Conversations seem to be one sided. I listen and hear, but feel as though a world apart from the speaker.
Recalling memories of times long ago seem unreal and dream like.
Relationships with others seem awkward and almost unnatural... as though I've never known them at all but I feel bonded to them to a certain degree.
I feel as though I'm slipping into depression. Although the feelings of depression are not uncommon to me, something feels different this time.
I feel like Descartes, questioning my existence. The only thing I can trust is real is my being. What is my being though? If death occurred, would my "being" cease to exist? Is this not the age old question that we've been asking for centuries? Perhaps I am not real though. Where would that leave life as a whole; a bunch of non-existent people making non-existent connections.
My God, how I yearn for a connection... how we all yearn for a connection! Something that ties us to another that is beyond physical and emotional; something spiritual. Something bigger than the involved cannot comprehend but can feel... somewhere deep within themselves... something they've never felt before.
I feel that death is but a heartbeat away; so close I can taste it; so far that it cannot be understood
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